“What up B-dog? Long time, no bros! Are we going to tear it up tonight, or what? Here’s what’s on the rocket-docket! My wife and I put the cheese out at 7, Cranium at 8. 9pm we watch 27 Dresses, everybody’s home by 11! Boo-yah!”—Crazy Willie (Barney Stinson’s friend)
Everything about this headline and article makes me want to stick my head into a thresher.
The most exasperating part? It’s a toss-up between the Business Insider listicle citation and the curious lack of examples of this “craft,” which you’d think would be worth highlighting since there’s a whole “academy” dedicated to its practice.
This is a sample of the Groupon in my area:
"A blown kiss often gets misdirected in the wind, inadvertently creating lovelorn alley cats and hopelessly romantic mailboxes. Take control of the signals you send with today’s Groupon: for $45, you get $120 worth of spa and salon services at Salon Luxin Shelby Township.”
Are you kidding me, Groupon? You are posting coupon information, not writing a romance novel.
I went to my niece’s band concert the other night and was shocked at how bad they sounded. When I was that age, did my band sound like that? In my mind, we were pretty damn good.
The whole experience was painful - audibly, physically (those benches hurt!), and olfactorally (?) (there were some smelly people around me). The one part I enjoyed, besides seeing my niece rock out on the clarinet, were the trivia questions on the back of the program. They really got me through the experience. So, I thought I’d share them with all of you.
Can you name the REAL title of these favorite holiday songs?
As I was driving home from downtown Ann Arbor this afternoon, I passed one of many frat parties. I saw a frat brother all decked out in U of M colors holding a beer bong forlornly to his side. It was kind of sad. Was there no one willing to bong a beer with this dude bro? He looked like he didn’t know what to do if he wasn’t holding that bong high above someone’s head and chanting, “drink, drink, drink!”